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Women and Aging
When I was ten years old, America celebrated it’s 200th Birthday. I told myself
that I wanted to live to be at least 111 years old so that I could see the tri-
Please don’t think that I am saying that looking old means looking bad. There is
a big difference between a beautiful twenty year old and a beautiful fifty year old.
One shows you the beauty of youth. The other shows the beauty of a soul. What
I find most interesting is that the women having the most problem with aging are
the beautiful ones. Maybe it’s because plain looking women have to make peace with
their appearance at a much younger age. Women who have spent a lifetime being beautiful
really seem to struggle with the approaching wrinkles and drooping body. What amazes
me are these women whom I have always thought were in their mid-
I have always loved a game my mother told me about years ago. She said that during the second half of her forties, she started lying about her age. She always added three to five years to her age so that people would tell her how awesome she looked. My mother is one of those women who was always naturally beautiful and then she also made a point of never going out in public looking shabby or frumpy either, so she has always looked younger than her real age. She could have gotten those same “Wow! You look great!” comments even if she had told the truth about her age. She told me the other day that at Denny’s Restaurant she was now considered a Senior Citizen, therefore she won’t ever step foot into one of their restaurants again! I knew she was only joking but I think that is part of what makes aging bearable for her, the jokes that she comes up with. She has always understood the importance of a good sense of humor to get you through life’s ups and downs.
To some degree, we can fight the visual effects of aging with Botox and plastic surgery, but the truth is, we are going to wrinkle or we are going to die. We can allow it to naturally take its course, or we can fight it tooth and nail. I can really understand why some women choose to fight against aging, especially if one’s sense of self worth is wrapped up in their looks. For some women, their entire sense of personal power comes from being visually appealing to others. That’s not to say they sell themselves, but that there is a power that comes from looking incredibly beautiful. It’s no secret that a beautiful smile can open doors. If you haven’t found a new form of personal power by the time those little lines start showing up, then you would naturally be feeling a loss. I guess the good thing is that you get roughly fifty years to find a least one other really cool thing about yourself to showcase to the world.
I want to tell those of you who are going through this pain to ask loved ones to tell you what other positive traits you have to offer. I want to tell you to ask people that you are connected with to share stories with you of times that you touched their lives or truly inspired or motivated them when it had nothing whatsoever to do with how you looked on the outside. I want to tell you to find something useful and fulfilling to do with your life as you are also probably retiring soon too. I want to tell you to be kind and gentle to yourself. Perspective changes, and wisdom and tolerance are facts of aging. Wait a bit and you will come to see that you were still beautiful at forty, at fifty, even at sixty you still had that beautiful twinkle in your eyes.
I can promise you that when I am eighty and looking back at pictures of myself at
fifty, I won’t be saying, “Damn, you looked old!” I had a major emotional breakdown
over turning thirty. I started melting when I was 27, 28, and 29 because I was about
to turn 30. It was one day when I was 33 that I came to realize that I looked better,
was happier, healthier, and stronger then I had ever been in my twenties. My entire
life I have thought of myself as plain and pudgy, yet whenever I look at old photographs
I always think that I was quite cute and that I wished I knew then what I know now
about personal appearances and self-
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