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Money Equals Love

When we think of prosperity and of creating abundance, it is easy enough to see how working at a job that we love helps us to earn more money than if we worked at a job we hated.  We can see that if we add plenty of love and warm-fuzzies towards how we treat our coworkers, bosses, employees, and customers, then it makes sense that people will like doing business with us and we will become more successful therefore earning more money.  We can understand how putting our love into the goods and services that we sell makes for superior products and therefore raises the perceived value of our goods and services.  Here is the hard part, it holds true in our personal relationships too.

How many women complain that their husbands do not spend enough time with them?  The wife complains that her husband does not appear to really care about her.  She thinks there is a lack of deep emotional connection between the two of them.  “You don’t say that you love me!  Therefore you must not love me!”  He quickly points out that his lack of flowers and romantic words do not mean that he does not love her.  After all, he works hard to earn enough money so that she can live in the house they share and so that she can choose to work, shop, raise kids, or whatever it is she does with her time.  She says that she appreciates the money, but it is not the same as love.  The argument can be condensed down to this, she does not see money as a symbol of love the way that he does.  So many men feel under-appreciated for their long hours working to support their families. And they feel that they are unfairly harassed for not spending enough quality time with the wife and kids.

Time is money.  That makes sense.  Bosses hire employees for their time on the job.  Most people are paid an hourly wage or a monthly salary.  How much they are paid per unit of time is determined by their expertise and the quality of work they perform.  However, the boss is paying his employees to do what he does not have the time to do himself.  

Love is time.  When you love someone, you naturally want to spend quality time with them.  You miss them when they are gone too long.  Go to any retirement home or a home for abused children.  The most important thing to these people is the personal time that you give them.  When you volunteer your time to a charity, a school, or a political campaign, it is because you love what it stands for.  

Time is a non-renewable resource.  We have a set number of hours each day that we can experience life.  We can fritter it away laying out in the yard on a sunny day doing nothing much or we can organize the heck out of it making sure we live every single moment to the fullest.  Sometimes we find out in advanced that we are sick and have x number of days, weeks, months left to live.  Usually, we have no idea how many days we have left.

So, when we give the boss our time in order to earn money for those that we love, then we are, in a way, giving the loved one our time.  The husband could decide that he would rather sit around watching TV all day or he would rather go fishing, but instead he goes to work every day so that his family can have a nice house and nice things to put in it.  He has given her his fishing time and his TV watching time.  Yes, he still needs to spend some time talking and connecting on an emotional level because a relationship that is all money and no romance is very lonely.  However, she needs to see that he has, in a roundabout way, given her his time and energy.  He really is trying to give her a gift from his heart.

To illustrate the point even further, we love professional athletes, musicians, actors, and other entertainers so much that we will pay a fortune to see them perform.  Those highly paid athletes are making that kind of money because we love them!  If we did not love them, then they would not get the ticket sales.  It would not matter how well they threw the ball if nobody wanted to watch them do it.  Famous celebrities are rich because a lot of people love their work.

This is not to say that it is okay to give money in lieu of love, but rather that for many men, this is their biggest symbolic gesture.  Remember too, they are hunters at heart.  The caveman had to bring in the dinner or his loved ones would perish.  They give money like women give hugs and kisses to babies.  Look at the single mom who cannot spend time with her children because she is always working to financially support them.  It is not because she does not love them.  The same thing holds true for two-income families, the mothers do not love their children any less just because they are gone working instead of home baking cookies.  Men need to remember too, that ONLY giving money as a symbol of their love is like a woman ONLY cooking and cleaning as a symbol of her love.  Both are huge gifts of the heart, but they are certainly not the only gifts that are needed for a strong bond.  

Money does equal love, but there are many additional forms of love to share.  Women hate to feel like they are just a paid housekeeper, cook, and chauffeur in a relationship.  Men hate to feel like they are just a life support system for a wallet.  Money cannot buy love and love alone will not create money, but the two are able to be converted back and forth into each other.  The one can equate to the other.  Love can make you prosperous, and sometimes money means “I love you”.